As I mentioned earlier (and as you may also have seen on Instagram), I flew out to Colorado on Wednesday to spend a long Easter weekend with some of my family. Truth be told, it could have been any weekend. I just really needed to get away. It just so happened I found an excellent fare out here for a long weekend and I’m so glad I booked the ticket.
I’m a big believer in having a change of scenery when things seem overwhelming or you’ve got a lot on your mind. Of course it isn’t always a luxury able to be afforded so sometimes said change of scenery has to mean hopping neighborhoods vs. hopping states but I’ve had so much going on internally that the Rocky Mountain blue skies and fresh air really were beckoning me (and a fare too good to pass up on American, really.)
You see I’ve been exploring some things for the past two months that I can’t quite share yet but the scheming I’ve been doing has been equal parts anxiety-ridden as it has been exciting. But it’s meant nearly every ounce of my free time going into researching, reading, networking and soaking up every last detail I can get my hands on.
In Colorado I don’t sleep particularly well (is there such a thing as too much fresh air for a New Yorker?!) but where my parents live is rather remote for this city-girl so there are few distractions which means a day full of hours I don’t have scheduled. It feels like such a luxury. I squeeze in a workout here or there (had a spontaneous day of skiing with some extended family on Thursday which was just what the doctor ordered!) but mostly I read (have already read two books since my arrival) and get lots of work done for the blog amidst family outings, meals and impromptu games of Bananagrams.
You see while I take “vacation days” off from Job #1, I never truly unplug it feels like when I’m out here. Which is good and bad. The good is that I’ve crushed my to do list. Over 40 emails written and in my drafts waiting to be sent, proposals outlined, emails newsletters researched, pins done, posts drafted…you name it. I’ve been so productive from the moment I’ve woken up that I feel energized and at the ready vs. many of the days I feel burnout in New York. Which is part of why I love coming out to the mountains. I get to do all of the aforementioned “tasks” surrounded by beautiful scenery that’s equal parts calming (mostly) as it is inspiring and I have the company of my family.
I struggle a lot when it comes to work/life balance. Any blogger working a full-time day job and blogging knows how this goes. It’s very hard to focus your energy in so many places and when I actually get full days to dedicate to wit & whimsy it’s like my brain is all of a sudden firing on all cylinders and I have so much I want to accomplish! So much post inspiration! So many emails to write! So many to-dos! It’s a blessing really but I often feel guilt for dedicating time that’s meant to be “down time” to it.
But then comes the guilt. Should I be taking proper down time? Cooking more or reading more? Spending more time outdoors vs. on my computer? Yes my internal conscience says.
In writing this rather long-winded post today I was reminded of how I felt when I was out in Colorado at the end of last summer. Still questioning balance. The good news? When I re-read that post I realize that I’ve come a long way since then. I have prioritized working out, I have come to the understanding that if I don’t pen 5 posts per week here that the world will not end and I have started to finally come to once again use this blog as a source of joy vs. stress.
So while I don’t know if I’ll ever figure out how to truly unplug or stop thinking what next or what more could you be doing, I am working at it little by little.
…and for now, we’ll call that a dose of success.
Thanks for bearing with me on today’s random, but somewhat necessary “state of Meghan.” Tomorrow we’ll be back to regularly scheduled programming 🙂