Being out of alignment is the best way to describe how I’ve felt for the past 2+ weeks. From a busy week in Paris to a house guest to a bachelorette party straight to a two week viral infection, I’ve felt ripped from my orbit of productivity and routine.
Last year when I read Gabby Bernstein’s book The Universe Has Your Back, she talks a lot about being in and out of alignment. It came back to me last week as I sat in my house on day eight of practically being quarantined and after six full business days of cancelled meetings and plans. There’s a place in her book where she says you can say aloud “I witness that I’m out of alignment with my power. I choose to see peace instead of this.” I had to say this to myself several times in the past week because, man, did this illness do me in.
I’m not one that really revels in idle time. I don’t do a lot of binging of shows or movies. I like to feel productive. I like being out in the world busy, busy most days and then coming home to a cozy apartment and a home cooked meal or going to an invigorating workout class. Every now and then some forced R&R is welcome but over a week of house arrest is not my idea of a cup of tea. I was so out of it I could barely attend to my inboxes and I ended up having to cancel countless outings and even push back two content collaborations due to my inability to shoot photos or even muster up the strength to write the posts. I also missed a collaboration opportunity given my inability to work. My morning routine, my skincare routines, everything…had gone out the window. I was in pajamas 24/7 and either on my couch, in the tub or in my bed. Making a meal felt like running a marathon. There was no makeup, no coffee, no alcohol and no motivation whatsoever.
Normally these viral infections knock you out for a few days but you know there’s a light at the end of the tunnel in a couple days. This one was different. It had its grip on me and over a week after I first felt sick I was back tele-conferencing with my doctor about what else I could do to feel better. My frustration was exasperated by the fact that I had done everything I was meant to. I rested and slept a lot. I was taking vitamin c, zinc and echinacea, drinking loads of fluids particularly tea with honey, using my neti pot and taking steam showers. I wasn’t working out and I avoided alcohol. But yet, this illness persisted.
Over the weekend I was finally able to get back out into the world. I caught up with my friends and my brother and went to yoga and boxing classes. It was so needed and so refreshing after so much time cooped up!
With the start of this new week, I am choosing to reconnect back into alignment and feeling in sync with the universe. In choosing to see the good in all of this, I’m so glad this didn’t happen while I was traveling or leading up to traveling. I’m glad I didn’t have to cancel anything earth-shattering (although I did have to cancel speaking on a panel the other week which I felt so badly about – I am never one to bow-out of obligations!) I’m committed this week to getting back into my routine and my good habits. I need them back in my life!
Gabby Bernstein also talks a lot about seeing obstacles as opportunities. I’m hopeful this illness will not revisit me anytime soon and that I’ll regain my health for the months to come.
Here’s to a fresh start this week!
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